Best Practice: Intentionally Bless The Difficult


I often ask the question, “Do you have . . . or have you had . . .  any difficult people in your life?”

There’s usually a silent pause followed by nervous laughter. 

The truth of the matter is this:  There are people who create difficulties on our path.  The way we navigate the difficulties will determine if, we will be negatively impacted.  At the end of the day, it’s our choice to invite or refuse an individual’s negativity to impact and consume what we think, feel, and do.

In other words, an individual does not have the power to hold our mind, emotions, and behavior hostage unless we agree to it. 

It comes down to making an intentional choice to live beyond the negativity of what someone says or does.

But.  It can be beyond hard to let go of the individual’s negative impact in our life.  The thing is . . . what we think on . . . is what we ultimately invite into our life.  Negativity does not invite anything into our life but more negativity. 

So.  We either release or react to the individual’s negativity, choosing to either respond with the best or the worst in mind.

Everything shifts when we choose to release an individual’s negative impact and respond with the best in mind, intentionally moving into the realm of God’s activity by blessing the person rather than sitting in the mess of negativity and wanting and hoping for the worst in their life.

When we focus on God first . . . when we look beyond the difficulties  . . . when we choose to live blessed and bless others . . . we experience transformation.

First Things First

Release the negativity.  Let it go.  Releasing is key to forgiving and being in the flow of God’s activity: ” For I am about to do something new.  See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland” (Isaiah 43:19 (NLT)). 


Bless those who create difficulties on the pathway.

When we are blessed, we know the activity of God.  When we bless, we are a part of the activity of God. 

Blessing others is key to freedom and fully experiencing the best of life.

Challenge Intentionally bless the person who has created the difficulty by praying for a blessing to be received.  To be intentional is to be decisive, purposeful, and deliberate.  Intentionally pray for the blessing each day for thirty consecutive days.

  1. Choose to be quiet about it, rather than “stirring” the negativity up by letting them know you are choosing the higher path.
  2. Keep it simple.  It’s your choice to ask for a specific or general blessing.  The key is to pray beyond what you think the individual deserves :   “God, will you bless (name) beyond his/her imagination today?”

Note:  This often takes a great deal of grace. It will take time to desire the blessing for them because it feels like they don’t deserve it.   Then again, none of us deserve the blessings of God. Blessings are a gift of grace.  Some people want to wait to do this prayer exercise until they “feel” they can.   But.  Nothing changes until we do something.


We are blessed as we intentionally bless others, aligning with God to bring something good into their life.  Blessing others does not change the difficulty; however, it changes how we navigate it because we’re transformed when there’s a connection with the activity of God.

Consider stepping out of an individual’s negativity into the divine plan of hope and a future for them.  (Listen to the Think On This podcast, Step Out To Bless.)


As pastors and life-coaches, we’ve listened to the stories of many people over the years.  It’s clear (more than ever) that individuals who work to develop best practices (healthy habits) and delete what’s not working (unhealthy habits) will find fulfillment and live their best.

Yes. Developing best practices is a life-time process. It requires intentionality and action.

When we keep doing what’s not working, it will continue not to work.  In other words, we become our own victim when we do less than best.  Best practices are an investment to the fulfillment of our best.

The thing is . . . fulfillment rises exponentially when best practices are developed . . . becoming a part of the rhythm, routine, and ritual (our three “R’s”) of our daily life.

Best Practice


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